NS REASSIGNS FAX WORKER TO PRODUCE DEPT., ZEITGEI$T RETURNS
Newton Studios nearly fired (“Name Withheld”), described by news director Charles Haley as “hopefully the last in a slurry of dismissed fax machine workers at our think-tank.” Yolanda Veeners, a longtime cagey NS veteran has come out of retirement to “revolutionize, revitalize and revamp the entire office situation.” Veneers, a farmer, has inherited her late husband’s massive debt, and is looking forward to hanging with the old crew.* (“Name Withheld”) was unavailable for comment.
An unnamed source provided an account of what actually happened and related the employee’s intern confused watching the fax with bostonfilm’s FAQ’s. Rob Zeitgei$t, a recent addition to the bostonfilm lineup, unleashed a torrent of derogatories and nearly quit when NS bungled the fact check on his name. ”
Apparently (“Name Withheld“) started adding ideas to the faq’s, rather than paying attention to the fax. Haley: “We had to apologize to Zeitgei$t for missing the $ sign in his nom-de-plume, which was all we were looking for in the first place. There is currently a debate as to whether we should forgo all uses of the letter “S” in exchange for “$”. We don’t give short shrift at NS, but (“Name Withheld“) is peeling bananas in Gags & Jokes.”
See Corrections.
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